Finding the middle ground when you’re living with a roommate is tricky but not impossible. It’s not all pillowfights and endless hangs, after all. Once you’ve sorted out the rhythm of cleaning dishes and taking out the trash, you will likely find yourselves confronting yet another aspect of cohabitating — how you will navigate the reality of being pleasure seeking adults. We don’t need to rely solely on the ol’ “hang a tie on the door” method. Here’s our top tips for roommates: 

 

Set aside time to communicate  

Talking through your schedules, preferences, and boundaries from the start is a good way to make sure you’re on the same page. Living arrangements are not a place for the “ask for forgiveness, not for permission” approach. Is it cool to have an overnight guest when they’re also around? What’s the policy on vibe use in the shower? Do noise cancelling headphones and an good eye mask forgive all? Talk through what’s fine and what’s not. 

The more notice, the better

When you’re going to have an overnight guest, giving eachother as much notice will help mitigate awkward situations. Even if it’s just 10 minutes, shooting over a quick text is better than nothing!

It’s probably not your business

Unless their behavior is making you genuinely uncomfortable or unsafe, try to reserve judgement. People deserve to feel accepted in their own space. 

You don’t have to be their friend, but you can be their person. 

Having a roommate that you form a friendship with is a beautiful thing but it’s not a must. A lot can happen in the span of a school year or lease- you will not regret taking care of eachother in a time of need even if you’re not BFF’s. 

Yes, they can hear you. Here’s some steps to mitigate the noise:

• Turn on a fan or some white noise

• Make sure your headboard is properly padded and away from the wall 

• Again, learn their schedule so you can take advantage of alone time

• Opt for quieter toys like a plug. Check out our field research to see what vibes can be heard behind a closed door. 

Our Quiet Vibe recommendations 

Choosing a toy that delivers both discretion and pleasure can be a difficult line to toe. Luckily, we've created a vibe matrix of all our vibes and where they stand. If you're looking for something that's rumbly and quiet, we recommend Pep, Shimmy, Puff or Squish.